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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23842348">Nomenclature</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/MissGillette/pseuds/MissGillette'>MissGillette</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Tilted [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Stranger Things (TV 2016)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alpha Billy Hargrove, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - No Upside Down, Billy Hargrove Has a Crush on Steve Harrington, Explicit Sexual Content, F/F, Female Billy Hargrove, Female Steve Harrington, Genderswap, Getting Together, Omega Steve Harrington, Porn With Plot, Suicidal Thoughts</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-04-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 11:55:45</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>17,156</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23842348</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/MissGillette/pseuds/MissGillette</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Steph has never met a female alpha before. Billie catches her playing Peeping Tom in the locker room and offers to give her an anatomy lesson.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Billy Hargrove/Steve Harrington</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Tilted [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1718029</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>260</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Nomenclature</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>So I went through AO3 reading F/F ABO fics to see what people do with female alphas. The results were less than satisfying to me, wasn't expecting what I found. So here's my spin on it.</p><p>Can't believe I even have to say this but: before anyone climbs onto a soapbox to start throwing buzz words around, I will remind you this is fictional. This is not meant to be a representation of any gender/genitalia combination. It's porn, people. If you take it for more than that, please click your device's back button and kindly leave. For the rest of you, please enjoy it! =D Leave a comment about how much you enjoyed it.</p><p>Fun fact: the original title of this fic was "Teacher's Pet."</p><p>Oh and heed that suicidal thoughts tag. Yea. It's not graphic, it just comes out of left fucking field lol.</p><p><a href="https://twitter.com/missraygillette">@missraygillette</a> I tweet about things I'm working on. Come love these stupid girls/boys with me.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>She doesn’t mean to stare. She never does, thinks she’s got the sneak-shower-room glance down pat. Everybody stares at Billie for one reason or another. Either because she’s beautiful, they’re envious, they hate her, they’re… curious about her…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>So Steph is barely surprised at all, doesn’t even startle in the spray, when Billie grumbles with her eyes closed, “You can ask, you know.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They’re not at each other’s throats anymore. Not after Billie had stumbled out of the woods one night during Spring Break and fell in Steph’s pool, open early only because it’s her fucking pool and it’s heated. Billie was shitfaced out of her mind. Almost drowned, ironically enough. Steph up in her room, the window open as she tried to finish her fucking history essay that was due the first day back, heard the heavy splash for what it was. Didn’t even look out the window, just raced downstairs and thought about what to do with a raccoon or a dog that fell in.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That had been a surprise, unlike this, as she dragged the waterlogged alpha out of the pool and almost gave her mouth to mouth. Billie coughed chlorine on her lips at the last second, and Steph just hovered above Billie while bloodshot eyes blinked wet and pitiful up at her. They’ve… been hanging out casually, extremely casually, ever since. Billie doesn’t drink more than a beer when they’re together. It’s progress.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Swallowing hard and trying for the casualness they keep around each other, Steph stutters, “Uh, what uh, what are you talking about, man? Ask what?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>There’s no one else around them. Tammy had showered near them, basking in Billie’s radiance—what beta wouldn’t. But everyone is gone or stuffing themselves back into their clothes. It’s been a long day, and finals start soon. It’s the end of the rat race for the seniors. For them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Blue eyes finally crack open under the spray of the showerhead. Even without lipstick on and her hair soaked like a drowned rat, Billie is gorgeous. Although she looks bored as always when she’s not got someone’s humiliation in her teeth like a toothpick. She turns towards Steph, hands holding her hips and jutting out just a little. Pushing her pelvis forward and the exact area Steph had been staring at. Or trying to peek at without being obvious.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re not the first person in this shithole to ask, so out with it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She doesn’t sound as annoyed as she could be. Like she’s been through this again and again and now the soreness of the conversation has long since worn off. Steph has never met a female alpha before, there’s not one in the whole town. So Billie blowing in at the beginning of the year was cause for so much excitement besides all the obvious things.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Still gun-shy, worried one wrong move will chase Billie away and make enemies of them again, Steph gently shakes her head.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, man, like I didn’t mean to do that, I’m sorry, you don’t gotta—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know exactly what you were doing, and this is your one chance to get an answer out of me instead of a fist to your pretty face. So stop pussyfooting around and just ask already.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Now the impatience creeps in. It’s the beginning edge of Billie’s meanness. Just because they’re… friends or whatever doesn’t mean Billie has lost any of her bark and bite. Steph being an omega doesn’t soften that combo, either, like Billie doesn’t care at all what they are. Steph wishes she could have that nonchalant attitude and not be obtuse like she’s being right now. Like the rest of Hawkins that treats Billie like a sideshow attraction.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Huffing a sigh, annoyed with herself, Steph gives Billie a once over again. Openly. Billie’s scarred eyebrow just flicks up. Steph’s gaze flinches down from Billie’s, over the toned planes of her right back to where the trouble has started. To hair darker than the dirty blond on Billie’s head. The coarse hair would provide some modesty to anyone other than an alpha. But on Billie, the soft and pink between her legs is rather pronounced and obvious, the enlarged clit most of all. Some of the betas on the team have labia or clits that poke out. It’s whatever, not everyone is smooth, tucked away like Steph. Billie is something else, though. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>A shiver runs through Steph when she forces doe eyes back to Billie’s stern face. She tries gently, “I didn’t mean to stare.” A pause. “I mean it, I’m sorry. I’m just like everyone else here and I’m curious about…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie’s eyebrow is still high when she drawls, “My dick?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph’s mouth hangs open a bit as she hesitates for how to reply to that. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“If… that’s what you call it, yea.” Steph winces all the same, hating how ‘it’ comes off so harsh.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie shrugs, sniffs, and then drops her hands from her hips.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Just like the rest of this hick town and never seen a female alpha, huh?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She’s already admitted as much, that she’s just as ignorant as everyone else. As an olive branch. There’s no real giving an olive branch to Billie Hargrove, though. She’ll strip it into a switch and beat you with it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yea…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Intense eyes on the sheepish omega in front of her, Billie takes a wet, slapping step forward. Some of the spray from Steph’s shower strikes Billie’s honey skin.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You want me to show you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Yes, please.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But Steph sputters over that voice in her head, takes a step back, and rambles, “You don’t-you don’t gotta do that, I get it, I’m being an asshole, I’m sorry Billie, really, I shouldn’t have said anything, I’ll—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t mind.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Boredom doesn’t flatten Billie’s voice anymore. It’s the same voice she uses whenever they get into a deep conversation when they hang out. About their parents, about their futures, stuff that’s hard to talk about. That voice is a door opening when usually it’s closed and Billie waves towards herself to welcome Steph through it. Closer to her, the real her. So Steph’s throat closes up tightly over her words. The offer isn’t a joke or Billie poking fun at her backwards ways. It’s genuine.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you sure, man? You really don’t have to, I’m being dumb about this.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie shrugs again and looks away when she says, “It’s not a big deal, Steph. You’re curious, I get it.” Blue eyes glance back at her, the inch in difference between their heights meaning nothing with Steph so caught up in Billie’s stare. Her focus. “Do you want me to show you or not? Final offer.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Without Steph thinking about it, her head nods like it’s barely attached. If she thinks about it, she’ll ramble her way into pissing Billie off. The alpha will roll her eyes, rescind, and Steph will always wonder what could have been. For all she claims to be an idiot, Steph knows she’s not dumb in this regard. She stares at Billie not like the boys do, but certainly along that same vein. Not the same wants. They see her as something to conquer, want to defile her just because she’s an alpha. Steph wants her in a way she’s still afraid to face. Something all consuming to sweep her up and never let her go. She’s been doing a lot of thinking since Billie Hargrove rolled into town, into her backyard and pool, and then into her evenings and weekends… She thinks about Billie Hargrove a lot.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Snorting, Billie smacks their showerheads off and then nods to the benches and lockers behind them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sit.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And Steph does so without toweling off or making for her clothes. The concrete under them is scratchy with texture, cold seeping up from the earth. The metal bench is even colder on her ass and thighs. A flinch and hiss rip out of Steph, but she sits all the same. Billie does snatch up her towel to squeeze water out of her hair. She wanders with the faded, yellow thing covering her head, sightless. Somehow she knows exactly where Steph is and comes to a stop in front of her. Their knees almost touch.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Huffing under the towel, Billie whips it away, freeing herself, and then stares down at Steph. Nothing lewd, just watching. Their nudity is nothing in the sanctity of this locker room… Even though when Billie sometimes showers at her place, the alpha wanders out of the bathroom without clothes or a towel covering her. Like now. It’s somehow different then, and Steph returns to old habits when she sneaks glances. She tries not to do that right now as she sits here shivering with the chill of the bench soaking into her skin. Her wet hair doesn’t help. Brown locks swept away from her forehead drip down her neck, her shoulders. Billie stares, makes some decision in her head, and then reaches for Steph with the towel cupped over her hands.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph sits up that much straighter when Billie repeats the motions she’d used on her curls. Squeezing water out instead of rubbing the towel all over her head like Steph would. Whether Billie intends the gentleness in her hands, Steph isn’t sure. She just keeps absolutely still for the warmth buffeting all along her front. She steps her feet farther apart if only to get out of Billie’s way. To welcome her closer so she doesn’t have to bend forward like now to do this. Lip in her teeth, Steph keeps her eyes forward on Billie’s flat stomach when the alpha hums above her. She takes that step offered, outsides of her knees brushing the soft insides of Steph’s thighs. Billie pulls the towel back then, and Steph’s next shiver has nothing to do with the cold.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Clearing her throat, Billie says roughly, “Anyway…,” and launches the towel to the bench beside the one Steph occupies. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Y-yea…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The need to fill the humid, hollow silence in here is almost overwhelming. The only thing that stops Steph from fulfilling that roll is all of Billie’s honey skin so close to her. Now with Billie directly in front of her, it’s obvious why Billie had wanted Steph to sit. She has a front row seat to Billie’s everything. Everything that’s almost the same on Steph but just out of step. And it’s not like Steph has been cramming her face in other girls’ laps or anything. Like she knows anyone’s body better than her’s, so she only has what’s between her legs for comparison. She draws in a shaky breath through her nose, back of her throat tingling with musk, and then she flinches away.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh… You um…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>At the top of Steph’s vision, Billie cracks a tiny grin in one corner of her mouth.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What, you been broken up with Wheeler so long you don’t remember what an alpha smells like?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The whole school knows that’d happened barely six months ago, so no, she hasn’t forgotten. And she pouts so Billie knows.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Shut up, I just wasn’t expecting it. You just showered…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yea, and you made sure to watch that I got behind my ears and up my ass,” Billie drawls with a bigger grin. “Alpha musk never really washes off us unless we’re on blockers and use a medicated soap.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph tips her head up just a bit, heart sinking at her thoughts, and asks, “How do you know that?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s a risk to ask that. To poke at the murky waters of Billie’s past instead of just enjoying the beach. It’s entirely possible Billie will just shut down on her. She only does that when Steph brushes some creature lurking just below the surface of dark water. There’s been more than one occasion that Billie snapped a hot retort at her, threw her cigarette or beer away, and then stomped off. And then the thick, hostile silence between them at school the next day. The worst part of being too nosy and familiar with Billie: that barbed silence. So Steph holds their gaze even as Billie’s grin flattens between her lips. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cuz up until we moved here, that used to be my life. But I fucked up last summer, lost my pills for a week, and that undid everything.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her hands are loose things at her side, but the left one rises slowly. Maybe to not startle Steph or maybe because Billie doesn’t know she’s doing it. Either way, Steph holds still when thick fingers play with the flop of her hair already in its rightful place. Steph tries to not let her eyes flutter at the caress, tries not to squirm or soak the air between them with contentment. It doesn’t work, because some of the hardness in Billie’s eyes crumbles. Steph can’t look away.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What do you mean by ‘undid everything?’”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie’s fingers continue petting Steph’s hair when she mumbles, “Had a rut the first time since I presented when I was 12. And then fucked my neighbor’s mom.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph’s jaw drops a little along with her stomach.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie soldiers on with, “Max was playing with his little friend, and I was supposed to bring him back for dinner. Well…” Billie shrugs. A resigned, mournful sort of thing. “His mom said they wandered off to the corner store for a Coke. I stuck around waiting for him, it hit me, I fucked her, and then the kids walked in on us.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie says that like she hadn’t been a kid herself when it happened. Like it’s her fault. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Billie that’s…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She shrugs again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wouldn’t have been so bad if Max didn’t go blabbing to his dad and my mom. Mom was the one who put me on pills and blockers, couldn’t stand that someone knew what I was. So she put in for a transfer as far away from San Diego as we could get. And now I’m here.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Throat tight for a different reason now, Steph shakes her head. All the while, Billie’s fingers haven’t stopped petting her hair. It’s maybe the only reason Steph is so calm and not gritting her teeth with righteous anger.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Searching for something to say and taking a few tries to find it, Steph eventually blurts, “It’s not your fault.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie snorts above her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I mean, I was the one who lost the pills so.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But you were just a kid too!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Another grin tugs at Billie’s boyish lips.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You also don’t know about the part where I had the hots for Mrs. Mackey and wanted to fuck her since forever so…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie throws her head back and cackles to the ceiling, covering up Steph sputtering. They don’t separate even when Billie’s knees bend, really getting her whole body into her villainous laughter. Big guffaws that roll up to the concrete ceiling and then echo back on each other until the whole locker room is just Billie laughing. It certainly lightens the mood, her joy at Step’s expense infectious. When Billie rights herself with a whoop and a shake of her head, Steph is trying to flatten a smile between her lips. It doesn’t quite feel appropriate to smile after such a heavy conversation, but she can’t help let it loose when Billie winks down at her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So that’s the story of how we ended up here and why I know about blockers. Pretty neat, don’t ya think?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>One of Steph’s shoulders twitches up in a shrug.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Still sucks,” she laments. “I know you hate it here, and I’m sorry it ended up this way.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lips sort of puckering before Billie sucks her teeth, she makes light of it, glosses over it, with a drawled, “It’s not all cow shit and misery. Yea, it sucks here, but there’s a few things that make it tolerable.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Now Billie finally slips her hand from Steph’s hair. Her bangs are dry thanks to the alpha’s radiant body heat, although that curtain doesn’t flop how Steph is used to. She’ll have to comb it into place while her hair is wet again. Steph’s heart does a funny thing as it jackrabbits into her throat. She doesn’t want Billie to stop, acts on some wild instinct when her hand darts for Billie’s wrist to stop her retreat. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph forces her eyes to stay up even as her head drops back down. So she blinks up at Billie through the top of her vision when she asks, “What um… what makes it tolerable? It must be really good since you… hate it here so much…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She trails off only because she wants to curl up and shrink under Billie’s hooded stare. No one has ever stared at her like that. With Billie’s body so close and her pulse under Steph’s fingertips, she understands the look for what it is. No one ever looked at Steph like this, but she knows the glimmer in Billie’s eyes well. When Billie flirts with someone and actually wants them. No one at school, but they’ve hung out at the diner before and Billie chatted up a girl who came home from college for a weekend. She didn’t get a number out of it, but they disappeared in the bathroom for long enough for Steph to know what they got up to. And the flush that lingered over Billie until they parted ways was so beautiful, and Steph just wanted to know what it took to make her so relaxed and look like that. Peaceful for once.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie’s wrist in her grip shifts until she takes Steph by the hand, too. Rough fingertips find her pulse in a mirror of her grip, and Steph flushes pink to her hairline. Because even if Billie couldn’t smell her tentative excitement, she’d catch Steph’s pulse rocketing under her porcelain skin. The scent of her will smear from her wrist to Billie’s fingertips and linger there even after they’ve parted ways. Maybe Billie will accidentally brush them through her hair or over her lips and catch Steph on her skin. Later. When she’s alone.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wouldn’t you like to know,” she rumbles from deep within her throat, a sound Steph cannot ignore. She gives Billie the shiver she surely wants even when Billie continues only slightly lighter, “So am I giving you an anatomy lesson or not?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s a lot of mixed signs and uncertainty that war with Steph. She and Billie have a rocky history between them. And Billie doesn’t strike Steph as the type to be interested in her. Truth be told, she’s not sure what Billie’s ‘type’ is, she’s just sure she’s not it. Can’t be it. She’d be stupid to think otherwise. Yet Billie stands here and tells her the terrible truth behind how she’d ended up here. Didn’t berate Steph for staring or being insensitive about her body, is still willing to show her so she’ll understand. It could be more than that, too. That Billie wants to show her to see how she’ll react. If she’ll be disgusted or…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Swallowing hard, eyes still up, Steph gives a little nod and says, “Yea, if you still want to. I’m um-I’m game.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie cocks her head just so all while still watching Steph. It’s too much interest and too much prolonged eye contact for the nervous animal rattling its cage inside Steph. She drops her eyes, even bows her head to make sure she can’t see Billie watching her, and stares where she’s been invited to look.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Clearing her throat, Billie shakes their hands apart even though Steph would rather the alpha not let her go. Steph’s hands are shy, uncertain things, and they seek each other out in her naked lap. Long fingers tangle together and fidget as Steph watches both of Billie’s hands slip between them. She almost pets lovingly over the dry hair between her legs, slides her flat palms farther down and in, and then holds hair and skin back so Steph can see everything.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The first word that comes to mind is ‘lippy.’ But heat rises embarrassed and ashamed in Steph’s face, and she quickly smears the word out of her mind and replaces it with ‘petals.’ Billie’s labia may not be smooth and tiny like hers, but it’s pretty like an orchid. Steph bites herself to stifle a smile at the comparison. She doesn’t think Billie would appreciate it. There’s just a lot to look at! The longer Steph’s gaze combs over pink and deeper red and can’t resist always coming back to that big clit, the hotter her face gets. The heat creeps all the way into her ears where every breath from either of them is a crash of cymbals together. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph jumps on the bench, too focused on the sight in front of her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lifting her head and knowing she’s flushed pink all over, Steph blurts, “Sorry.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie’s eyebrows come together.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“For what? I said you could look.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I-I know, it’s just, isn’t it weird? To just let me look?” Steph waggles her head around. She’s not a prude, fuck no, this is just awkward. So incredibly hot she’ll be thinking about it for days, but still awkward. “It’s not like you go walking around flashing your—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Dick.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“—okay, flashing your dick to everyone… Can I ask why you call it that?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie adjusts her grip, pulling hair back again, and says, “I had the term ‘micropenis’ thrown around a lot when I presented. Which I didn’t like because I don’t have a penis, and that’s just about the least sexiest thing I could call it. Plus it usually turns straight guys and male alphas off when I use the same word they do. So fuck ‘em.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That’s such a Billie thing to do. Use someone’s pride against them to make them insecure. Some of the embarrassed tension in Steph melts away when she turns her attention back down. It’s not so shameful to look, now. Billie is so casual about it. Have they ever spoken so easily about something so private? She has questions, of course, so her embarrassment doesn’t slip away entirely.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Can I ask you another question?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie’s voice is thick and amused when she fires back, “Are you gonna feel like a cow after asking?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No,” Steph mumbles with a huff. “I’m genuinely curious, I’m not trying to—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Steph, baby, please, I’m just fucking with you.” The alpha’s flat belly shakes when she laughs, not quite as loudly as before. Steph lets her cheeks fill up with tingly warmth as the word ‘baby’ pets over her. “Ask whatever you want, I don’t give a shit. Heard it all before, trust me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph has the first question ready when Billie sways on her feet. Lightning quick, Steph’s hands fly up to grab her by her thighs and steady her. Not that the alpha needs it, catches herself before she stumbles. Once her hands are there over warm skin and muscles, though, Steph struggles to convince herself to let go. She won’t embarrass herself further by petting Billie up and down like she wants to. The desire strikes unbidden and unknown. She’s never touched or wanted to touch someone like this. But there’s plenty she’s never wanted that she wants with Billie, so…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ve heard female alphas don’t get wet like other girls. Is that true?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie leans a little into Steph’s hands and sighs, “Yea, pretty much. If I want something in me, I gotta use lube. Dry as fuck unless I’m stupid horny, which doesn’t happen very often.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Um… Do you get hard?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sort of.” Billie shifts under her hands again, rubbing their skin together. “Not like how you think. She gets a little bigger than that, but not much.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That draws Steph’s eyes down to the ‘she’ in question. She can’t imagine what that must feel like. How big Billie is all the time, even unaroused. Whenever Steph squeezes her thighs together, it’s only the pressure she notices. But she bets Billie feels it. Whereas Steph’s clit is maybe, </span>
  <em>
    <span>maybe</span>
  </em>
  <span> the size of the tip of her pinky, Billie’s… dick is probably more like from the tip of Steph’s index finger to the first knuckle. If they were to have a measuring contest like a pair of dumb boys, Billie would win hands down. She’d said it doesn’t get much bigger than this… Steph swallows hard and tries not to think about what it would take to make Billie hard.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Shuffling on her ass and adjusting her grip on Billie’s thighs, Steph asks next, “Do you have a knot?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie is amused again when she repeats herself, “Sort of. When I’m in rut, it just swells up more. Hurts like a motherfucker.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sorry,” Steph sighs. “That sounds rough. You can’t really do what your body wants to do, and you suffer for it. Doesn’t sound fair.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Boyish hands adjust their grip again. Steph thinks if she were the one doing this, she’d probably be wet by now. Maybe she is right now, but not enough for anyone to know except her. It doesn’t take much to get her dripping, though.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Life’s not fair. That all or you got more?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph sort of shakes herself out of a tiny stupor. She has so many questions…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So if you can’t knot someone, what do you do to make it go down?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The silver on Billie’s middle finger catches the light when she peels that hand away from her mound. Her pinky, ring, and middle finger cram against her generous labia to hold it back while her thumb and index finger grab pink flesh and hold it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Pinch,” Billie says softly, voice almost husky. Steph can’t look away, thinks she’d lose it if she lifted her head to meet Billie’s eyes. So instead she watches Billie’s rough fingertips roll and play with herself. Squeezing. Stroking. “It gets complicated with other people. They see this and aren’t interested in touching me. Just want me to fuck them so.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph’s heart sinks even more than before. Just like the other times today she’s reached out to touch Billie without thinking, she does the same now. She covers the back of Billie’s left hand and her wrist, mindless of the fact that her short fingers still cradle her dick. It’s still funny to think about, but at least that helps drive away some of Steph’s sadness. She’d never thought about Billie fooling around with people—which is the rumor, and Billie never confirms or denies—and it being one-sided. Maybe that’s why Billie flirts so much? Because she thinks no one wants her? It’s too deep a thought for Steph to pick apart with Billie still on display and the musk of her thicker than before. Steph isn’t the only one hiding interest stirring. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her throat is tight, voice strained, when she says, “I’m sorry, man. That’s not cool, that people do that to you.” She pets the bump of Billie’s wrist with her thumb. No thought. Just action. “I wish it wasn’t like that for you. They don’t know what they’re missing, I bet it feels good to touch you. They’re just shitty.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She doesn’t mean to feel so strongly about this, to come off so heated about it. Steph closes her eyes to the display as Billie huffs a few laughs above her. All of Steph’s reasonable questions fly out of her head now with the knowledge that maybe no one has ever offered Billie pleasure. Like a blowjob or eating her out. Something. She has to know, has to get the words out.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So I guess no one’s ever blown you before?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A bark of laughter claps off the walls and lockers around them, and Billie chuckles, “No, can’t say I’ve ever had the pleasure. Why, you offering, baby?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She goes on chuckling deeply to herself, nudging her honey thigh into Steph’s hand. Both of Steph’s hands twitch where they hold the amused alpha. It’s a self-deprecating sort of laugh, though. This isn’t the first time Steph has heard it, and just like every time in before, it draws up a strange mix of sadness and anger. Sad for Billie, that she thinks so lowly of herself. Anger at the people who’ve made her feel that way about herself. Doctors and society and her own family. Steph’s hand still on Billie’s thigh tightens until her short nails threaten to bite into the skin.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I wouldn't say no.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That gets Billie to stop shuffling under Steph’s hands. Her fingers stop petting between her legs, too.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sorry, you wanna run that by me again? I think I—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Heat tingling under her eyes, Steph lifts her head, meets confused blues, and repeats, “I wouldn’t say no. If you asked me if-if I wanted to.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She stutters, yes, but she means it. Dating Nathan had given her the chance to learn how to do it, what works and what feels good. Pressure and suction and tongue working together. Should be the same on Billie. Or close enough since Steph won’t have to worry about choking. So to have that history and confidence behind her and look up at Billie’s expression blown wide, Steph has to keep her ego in check. She likes to think she’s pretty good at sucking guys off. She’d be good at this too. For Billie.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie scoffs and lifts her head so she’s looking even more down at Steph.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So if I ask if you wanna blow me, you’ll say yes?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yea.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie blinks fast a few times like someone has slapped her in the face and she can’t quite believe it happened.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So you wanna blow me?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Shoulders sort of dropping and rolling her head around, Steph insists, “Yes, Billie, I want to blow you. With my mouth. Until you come. Can I make it any clearer?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The only way she could make it clearer is to crane forward and just shove her mouth on top of Billie’s thick fingers. Take over what she’d started. Because true enough, when Steph glances down lightning quick, Billie is maybe a tiny bit bigger than before, sensitive flesh darker with blood. She can’t look too long or she’ll start squirming and give away just how badly she wants this. Billie isn’t the only one who is familiar with medicine to alter her cycle. Steph has her little pills she takes to keep her heats away. With how much she wants her mouth on Billie right now, she’d think she forgot to take them. She bites her lip and tries to stop her head from swimming as she aims big eyes up at Billie.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m pretty good at it, promise.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Biting through a smile, Steph watches Billie’s suspicions break. Whatever had held her back, made her question the validity of Steph’s claim, drains out of her. Grin lazy on her handsome face, Billie slips her hand out from under Steph’s. The alpha musk of her is surely soaked into Billie’s palm, which is why she reaches for Steph’s jaw. She rubs the scent all along porcelain and beauty marks, thumb tracing the apple of a cheek. Steph does her one better, curious what Billie tastes like, and twists her head quickly to catch Billie’s thumb in her mouth. She can’t quite muffle the quiet curl of noise that rises in her throat. A mix between the softest groan and whine. Eager.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fuck, Steph,” Billie rasps, angling her thumb better for Steph until cherry lips can sink no further down. “You’re serious…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She pulls back, sucking all the way, and smears a kiss over the pad of Billie’s thumb when she pops off.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What can I say, I like sucking dick.” Steph glances down to Billie’s but just as quickly returns her eyes to the flushed face above her. Never once titling her head for any of this, keen on shooting big eyes up at Billie. She mouths more kisses to Billie’s wet thumb before she murmurs, “Can I? I really want to. I wanna make it good for you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie’s right hand, uninvolved until this point, finally stirs at her side. Steph keeps still when thick fingers card the wave of her hair back. Like this, Billie has the perfect view down her toned body to watch everything. A front row seat.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Shit that’s hot,” she breathes. The thin space between them chokes more with her musk. Billie holds Steph’s hair out of the way and thumbs at her plush, bottom lip. “Ask me again? It’s fuckin hot to hear you say it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Oh, she can do that. She can lay it on thick and spin Billie’s wheels until the hubcaps fall off. Years of sloppy make outs with alpha boys too trigger happy to actually get far with her has built up her skill in this area. Steph knows exactly what to say, how to look up at Billie to make her shiver.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Mindless of the locker room, how she’s naked and mostly dry, Steph lets her voice drag through her next exhale. So eager and turned on that her skin comes alive. Between her own splayed thighs, she throbs with potent want. That’s the power of an alpha, desire petting over her like Billie’s fingers in her hair. She hopes Billie keeps doing that, hopes Billie watches her while she does this. Mostly because Steph likes to look up at whoever she’s blowing and watch them lose themselves. The irony, considering how charged she is right now and they’ve done nothing. When Steph gathers herself and what she wants to say, her focus is all on Billie above her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Voice soft and nearly breathless, Steph asks, “Please, Billie? I wanna suck you off so bad.” Her hand on Billie’s thigh tightens to feel the shiver in her better. “You can fuck my face if you want to, I’ll let you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Their eyes flutter together, and Billie even groans a bit. The hand in Steph’s hair trembles. She’s not done yet.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph nuzzles Billie’s thumb resting at the corner of her mouth, and still looking up adds at last, “I need my mouth on you right now. I’ll be good, your good girl, please alpha?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s the whimpered ‘alpha’ that does it. Or maybe Steph’s big eyes and how her bottom lip is fat when she pleads. Something presses all of Billie’s buttons in the right order to unlock her. She shuffles that much closer to Steph. To make it easier for her. Steph doesn’t need the hands on her head to guide her forward and down a bit. She’s sat here this whole time in the cloud of Billie’s musk, now thickened with desire. Steph doesn’t need any coaxing. She does give Billie a groan when she presses her mouth and nose to dark blond hair, breathing her in and reveling in the familiar tingle in the back of her throat. She’ll fill her head with alpha musk and lose it on this bench.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mmm, Steph, baby.” Thick fingers pet through her hair while the other hand holds her by the back of her head. “Fuck you look so good like this. Shoulda been doing this a long time ago.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie’s next curse is a distant thing that has to bounce off the ceiling. Steph is too busy rubbing her face in Billie’s scent to keep her eyes up. She’ll take her fill of the alpha’s expressions and reactions in a moment. Billie clutching her tightly to that coarse hair is a rush, though. Billie doesn’t quite push down on her head, but her strength is there. Ready to take Steph by the reins and guide her. Restrained aggression. Hell yes they should have been doing this a long time ago. Steph is glad Billie sees it her way and finally slides kisses and little nibbles down the short distance to where they both want her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph takes a moment, long enough to lick her lips and blink hazy eyes between Billie’s legs one more time. She won’t need to look down for the rest of this. No, her eyes will be up to watch Billie watch her right back. Eye contact is too intense for her in normal circumstances. With her breaths petting over the little dick she wants to lap at and suck so badly waiting for her, Steph angles big eyes up. Billie is there waiting for her, her own blues narrowed with fangs dropped and digging into her lip. Waiting for that first brush, for something no one has ever given her before. It thrills Steph to know she’s the first, and she tips her jaw forward with her tongue out for that first lap.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie sucks a loud breath through her teeth. Anyone could walk in on them. It’s the girls locker room after all. Steph almost wishes they were anywhere else so Billie can be as loud as she wants. Next time. There will have to be a next time, they can’t just do this once and then never again. Steph groans almost against Billie’s body, almost with her mouth pressed flush to burning flesh. She resists only so that she can tease Billie more. See how hard she can get. Steph dips the point of her tongue alongside Billie’s dick, playing with all the folds and skin she has. They’re soft and pink, and Steph finally does bring her mouth flush to Billie only to catch a lip between hers and suck on it. Billie bucks right into her face, hands tight in her hair to the point of pain.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Holy shit,” she breathes down at Steph, watching her cherry lips nibble and shift with suction. Billie shakes her petting hand free to scoop all of Steph’s bangs back again. “Fuck Steph…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Reducing Billie’s talkative mouth to nearly monosyllabic responses fuels Steph to hurry back up. She hums and licks and kisses all of Billie along the way, smiles when she rubs her lips over the alpha’s cock. So much better than the boys she’s fooled around with. Billie’s body is different from hers, but pretty in some way. Like how Steph looks at herself and admires the colors between her legs and how her labia and little clit seem to just suit her. Billie is perfect the way she is, and Steph wishes she could tell Billie that. Instead, she lavishes wet, lippy kisses to her cock and smiles up at her when Billie groans again. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Good?” Steph pants.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie’s palm catches in Steph’s hair when she goes to pet the omega. Sweat. But Billie exhales with a shudder, widens her stance, and gives a nod.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fuck yea, it’s good. Keep going, baby, I wanna feel your lips around me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph flashes her a brief grin, can do, and gives Billie a few more laps. She wants everything wet, wants to cradle Billie between her plush lips and suck until the alpha is about to collapse. The first time Steph seals her lips around Billie, eyes up always up, she wonders how long Billie will last. Nathan hadn’t lasted long at all the first few times. Always shy when she did it to him, and he would either lie down so he couldn’t look at her or just close his eyes to not meet hers. Watching her down his rail-thin body always made him come immediately. But Billie doesn’t look away for a second as Steph waggles her head a little with gentle suction around her dick. Always gentle to see how much her partner can take. The blood-hot firmness pinned between her lips draws a moan out of Steph, and it tingles over every bit of Billie.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fuck,” drags out of Billie long and low. She throws her head back for a breath or two, and then she’s right back on Steph’s eyes. “Fuck, do that again, holy shit baby…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Oh, Billie definitely won’t last long. Steph almost smirks around her. The musk between them truly is choking now, but Steph wouldn’t bow her head out of it to breathe for anything. Her hands still on Billie’s thighs take some of her weight, now. Not enough to send Billie pitching forward or crumbling to the floor. It just excites the throbbing wetness between Steph’s spread legs to know she makes this powerful creature weak. So she picks up a rhythm of pressure, thrusting not really an option in this case. When the muscles under Steph’s hands tense to the snapping point, she switches back to just circling her tongue around and around the warmth between her lips. She doesn’t pull off, doesn’t let Billie slip out of her mouth. Just teeters the moaning alpha between the two sensations.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The heat turns up with little grinds of Billie’s pelvis into Steph’s face. Not hard enough to hurt her, her straight nose in no danger of being bashed. Steph encourages the stuttered back and forth, her hands finally taking some control. Billie’s fingers in her hair twist, a growl on the heels of the slight pain that spikes in Steph’s scalp. So Steph relaxes her hands and rides the back and forth of Billie’s body against her jaw. Steph waggles her head again, hoping for wetness, but not finding it. No matter. Humming around Billie again, Steph slips away long enough to glide her tongue down, down, all the way down until the tip flicks against her entrance. Some slickness, not nearly enough to compare to Steph. She’s probably leaving a little puddle on the bench. But the caress has Billie almost shouting to the concrete walls, so Steph seals her lips around the alpha and sucks all the harder.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Above, Billie is a record of, “Fuck, fuck, fuck,” stuck on repeat. Steph hums along and eats up the sight of her, how blue eyes pinch shut sometimes as Billie grimaces and pants. Trying not to come so fast. It whispers in the way Billie’s thighs shake, how her hips start to falter. Steph has her grinning eyes point up at Billie when the alpha gnashes her teeth in a snarl. Her blues are so bright and wild as she takes another shuffling step closer to Steph, shoving her body fully to the omega’s face. Billie’s left leg is up in a blink, foot braced on the bench beside Steph. That changes the angle, gives Billie more control to fuck Steph’s face. Steph just relaxes her jaw and her breaths, lets her lips and tongue do all the work. All her attention is on the warmth of Billie’s cock suckled between her lips, almost numb, when the alpha comes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Steph, baby!” Her nails dig into Steph’s scalp, and Billie’s chest caves in as she starts to buck to the snapping waves of her orgasm. Her mouth drops open in a silent cry before a low moan bellows out of her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And then something wet gushes against Steph’s chin and spits all over her neck and chest. Steph tries to flinch back, but Billie’s hands are a vice around her head. Keeping her still while those hips keep rutting into her mouth. Steph’s eyes are wide up at Billie’s that have narrowed to blue slits. Her first thought of what’s happening is rather crass, and she doesn’t dwell on it, because whatever is now dripping down her chest can’t be </span>
  <em>
    <span>that</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Steph refuses the disgusted shudder that tries to rip through her. She’s never been with a female alpha before. Maybe this is just how they come. Whatever this is. At least Billie’s moans timed to the waves of her orgasm are so pretty, help stoke the fire that had wilted some in Steph at the first brush of wetness. Billie is the one to twitch against Steph’s face and pull them apart. When she blinks haze out of her eyes and looks down on Steph, sees the mess all over her, a lazy grin blooms on those wicked lips.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oops,” she grunts, so clearly not sorry and deeply amused. “Guess I should have warned you about that, huh?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph licks feeling back into her lips before she glances down. Billie’s hands in her hair, sort of petting her again, allow her that much as Steph stares with huge eyes at herself. She’s wet from her throat all the way to her navel with whatever this is. There’s a wet spot on the floor directly under Billie where she’s still dripping. It just smells like Billie and her alpha musk, isn’t unpleasant. Steph still wants to know what the hell she’s covered in now. Will need that second shower here rather than at home. She goes to rise to do so, but Billie’s hands in her hair do not let her budge an inch. Billie drops her leg back to the floor, steadies herself on shaking knees, but she keeps Steph still. Steph tosses a huff up at Billie and nudges against the alpha’s hands. No go.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You mean about the fountain that just erupted all over me?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie’s grin is still slick and lazy when she drawls, “Yea, isn’t it great? You smell like mine.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That sends a bolt of heat right between Steph’s legs where she’s unsatisfied. And to think she’d lamented while blowing Billie that she wasn’t wet the whole time. Steph almost wants to laugh at herself, but she’s sticky, and Billie is starting to dry on her. And it’s uncomfortable on her skin.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So… you wanna clue me in on what this is? Not that I didn’t enjoy blowing your mind just now.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie hums and shuffles her shoulders. So pleased as she smiles down at Steph. A real smile, so rare on that intense face.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“If you’re worried I just gave you a golden shower, don’t, cuz I didn’t.” And Steph flushes because yes, that’s what she’d thought. Billie snorts and rubs tight circles into Steph’s scalp, and Steph relaxes all over again. “It’s just ejaculate, I think the term most of you use is”—Billie rolls her eyes, disgusted—“squirting, which I fucking can’t stand.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph has to wait for Billie to stop massaging her scalp to flutter her eyes open and say, “Oh, okay. Yea thanks for that heads up, buddy. Gonna need another shower now.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She doesn’t mean it to sound annoyed or grossed out. Billie must take it that way, because her expression falls and her hands almost flinch out of Steph’s hair. Just a bit, just enough for Steph to catch. Steph’s hands finally come back to life on Billie’s thighs, take to petting her how she’s wanted this whole time. Just the rasp of skin on skin, up and down.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I didn’t mean it like that,” she insists. Gently but with pointed eye contact despite how it makes her squirm. “I didn’t mean it like it’s gross or I didn’t like it, okay? I just wasn’t expecting it.” She glances away now, lips pouting a bit with embarrassment as she mumbles, “I like it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Quietly, so unsure, Billie asks, “Yea?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph still won’t look at her when she adds, “It was hot…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph’s words must do something for Billie. Must satisfy her in some way, must snuff out the ember of bitter uncertainty. That her body repulses Steph just like everyone before her or that Steph regrets it. None of that insecurity is in Billie’s face or the deep purr she gives when she bends down for Steph. Her hands still control Steph and tilt her head up at just the right angle to take her lips. The kiss is unexpected even as Steph watches Billie come for her. Billie eats her surprised squeal right up, laps the gap between Steph’s lips wider until she licks into the omega’s mouth. And Steph licks back.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They share a groan in their kiss, but it doesn’t last. Billie pulls away with Steph’s tongue peeking out of her mouth, gets her under her arms, and then draws Steph to her feet. They’re a stumbling mess, the pair of them, as Billie drags Steph’s weight back to the damp floor of the showers. She loops an arm around Steph so she can smack the water back on. It’s not as hot as it could be, but Steph doesn’t care as Billie backs her into the pipes under the soaking spray. They’re completely drenched in a matter of seconds, and mindless to the mess still clinging to Steph’s skin, Billie presses all the space out between them and takes her lips again. She must not mind the taste of herself, because she dives right back in with heavy breaths and aggressive tongue.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The bar of soap Steph uses, keeps in her locker especially for school, is still in a little wire basket looped around the pipes. Billie smacks chaste kisses to her lips, eyes cracked open to watch Steph, as she reaches blindly for the bar. Steph shivers as the metal behind her heats up. It won’t burn her thanks to the lukewarm temperature Billie has set. She’s still stuck between a rock and a hard place. Billie doesn’t scare her, just makes her heart race and blood pump for a different reason. Because that hooded look she gives Steph promises so much. To take care of her, to provide pleasure in return—maybe more than Steph gave her, if the way Billie licks her lips means anything. Steph doesn’t care what Billie does to her, just wants hands on her. Anything.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She gets those hands slick with soap petting all over her front. Steph’s hands try to reach for Billie to hold on, but the alpha snaps her teeth and growls her hands right back down. That’s not unusual, the alpha she’s fooling around with to get possessive and bossy after an orgasm. It’s almost sweet, because she knows Billie means it in a tender sort of way. Let me take care of you, let me do this for you, let me let me let me. Steph shivers hard when boyish hands sweep up from her navel to cup her breasts. Billie isn’t so chaste here, content to squeeze and roll that softness in her hands, flick her thumbs over dusky-pink nipples. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph’s belly jumps with another throb between her legs, and she breathes Billie’s name barely above the static of the spray. Billie bows her head close, mindless how she’s blocking the water from hitting them, and purrs in her ear. It’s such a sweet sound, low and rumbling, coming from her. Almost too soft for all of Billie’s sharp edges and gleaming teeth. Steph huffs a gentle laugh at her jaws and nuzzles her, gives her a happy groan. That groan turns to thick syrup in her throat when Billie’s soapy hands drag blunt nails down from small breasts, over Steph’s belly, and then to the tops of her thighs. Steph can’t throw them open fast enough, pops her hips forward as an invitation. They’re not touching anywhere except Billie’s hands and their cheeks. So Billie hears and feels every noise Steph makes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Billie mmm alpha,” she pleads with her eyes closed, knows Billie’s are still open to eat up her every twitch. “Please touch me. I want you to.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie’s hands don’t linger on her thighs, though. They soap up and wash clean the lingering evidence of her orgasm before Billie steps completely away. Steph whines at that, manages to open her eyes to plead that Billie not stop. But those callused hands just take her by the hips and tug her away from the pipes, back into the spray. Billie chases rivulets of water up and down Steph’s pale skin during the rinse. Their noses brush, and Steph tries to steal a kiss, cheeky. Billie denies her with a bob of her head away. She comes back down to purr almost on Steph’s lips as she finishes cleaning her up. Those big hands of hers are back on Steph’s breasts for a few more squeezes, enough to have Steph squirming and arching her chest into the touch, before Billie advances on her again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>This time, Billie swivels them around and directs them to the yellow-white of the cinderblock wall. Steph knocks into it with a huff, and the chill here like in the concrete floor saps her warmth. Billie is a furnace all along her front, though, and she gladly takes any extra heat Billie gives her. She’s not connected to the cold floor for long, though. Billie loops her arms around Steph's thighs and then hikes her up the wall. Pale skin is wet enough, painted wall smooth enough for Steph to go slipping right up. Her legs snap around Billie’s hips in an instant, although her arms are more hesitant to encircle her neck. She recalls Billie snapping teeth at her to keep her hands to herself. But now Billie is all purrs in her ear and trails kisses along her jaw towards her mouth. So although slowly, ready to submit to a growl, Steph threads her arms around Billie’s neck. It’s the right decision as Billie surges between her legs and slams her into the wall.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie has the power and stamina necessary to fuck her against a wall. Nathan had tried once, but Steph weighs every bit she should for her height and athleticism. Nathan wasn’t up to scratch, practically dropped her to the floor in her bedroom. So embarrassed, he left without continuing in any fashion, quick to flee and promising to call her. Steph doesn’t quite scream when Billie does it again and again, but she does rake angry welts on her upper back and throw her moans to the ceiling. Billie snaps her body into Steph’s one last time, the omega quivering and clinging properly to her, before she smashes all of  their weight weight to the cinderblocks. This way, Billie slips her left arm free from Steph’s thighs. Steph holds her breath, hopes against hope Billie will touch her, and trills all pretty when Billie squeezes that hand between them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Calluses pet up the softness of Steph’s inner thigh, headed straight for where she needs the alpha to touch her now! Now! If Steph could throw her legs apart to give Billie more room, she would. So Billie will have to work in the tight confines between them, although Steph tries to curl her hips forward. Offering herself. She shakes hard against Billie’s strength when the alpha thumbs her open. Billie’s groan in her ear is a thunderclap directly overhead. Maybe she hadn’t expected Steph to be so wet. Steph breathes heavily into the gap between Billie’s lips as the alpha gives her heavy moans with every caress. Like Steph is the one touching her. Steph dares to steal a kiss when Billie swipes her thumb back and forth a few times. Testing the waters.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Squeezing her legs around the alpha, Steph pleads against her lips, “Need you, Billie, need you so bad inside me, I’m wet all for you. Just fuck me, I wanna come alpha, please!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lips crashing into hers and a tongue shoved into her mouth cut that plea short. Steph whines around the tongue that laps into her mouth, plays with hers. She whines all the louder when Billie gives the briefest of pinches to her little clit. Mean, but playful. The lips devouring hers smirk some when Steph jumps from the shock. Well, she jumps as much as Billie’s weight flattening her to the wall allows. Billie grinds her into the wall even with her hand smashed between them as retaliation. Stay still, let me do this, let me give you this. So Steph sags between a rock and a hard place, head rolling away to end their fast and filthy kisses. Each pant sends her bared throat bobbing as she waits for whatever Billie wants to do to her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Alpha,” she croaks, thighs squeezing Billie’s hips.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The static spray of the shower can’t hope to cover the deep purr in her ear and Billie rumbling back, “Steph.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She purrs that with her lips tickling the shell of Steph’s ear while maneuvering her hand. Flipped down with her fingers pointing to the floor, she presses her palm flat between Steph’s legs. Steph is plenty wet for her to slide the heel of her palm over the poor omega’s little clit. She squirms immediately and tries to rock with Billie, seeking friction despite her slick making it difficult. Billie bares more weight into her to make her stop. Even a whine doesn’t persuade Billie to let her be bad and take her pleasure. Billie presses her to the wall hard, hard, hard until Steph gives up with a whine. Her weight is Billie’s to take, and her strength holds true even as fingertips slip through slick skin to toy at her entrance.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph’s next moan is a fluttering, warbling thing when the pads of those fingers pet where she’s soft and aching. All she can do is cling tighter to Billie. Moving her hips to try and plunge Billie’s fingers inside her will just result in Billie pulling away or pressing her to the wall again. So she trembles and submits, gives the tiniest wiggle if only to encourage Billie. A deep hum in her ear, so pleased, precedes Billie increasing the pressure on her wet hole. It’s not enough to push past that plush wetness, and Steph relaxes as much as she can to welcome thick fingers inside her. As a last ditch effort, Steph throws a desperate whine to the ceiling. She wants to bang her head against the wall.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Voice high and all over the place, Steph begs, “Billie, oh please, f-fuck you’re driving me crazy.” More pressure, almost slipping inside her. The heel of Billie’s palm rubs back and forth over her clit, probably as a reward for not trying to take pleasure. Steph carves her kitten claws all over Billie’s shoulder blades and wails all the louder. Her whole body trembles, threatens to shake apart when she cries to Billie’s neck, “Please alpha! I need you!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A warm exhale ghosts down her neck when Billie finally pushes inside. Steph parts around her, opening beautifully wet and warm with a fresh moan. It bounces off the walls perhaps too loud, but Steph doesn’t have the mind to care. She wants to rock herself between Billie’s weight and the wall to fuck herself, but she can’t. Physically she can’t, but also Billie will just pull out to punish her. Even through the haze of her pleasure, of snapping tightly around Billie’s middle finger, she knows what’s expected of her. She keeps still besides her trembling and scrambling at Billie’s back. The flat of Billie’s knuckles comes to rest against her, and the alpha just lets her squeeze around that one finger for a few breaths.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph almost tugs on damp curls when she pleads into Billie’s neck, “More!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A chuckle is her reply. No teasing words, just the burning slide of Billie out of her to return with more. Billie twists two fingers barely an inch inside her. To flick and dart quick in and out, to spread her open and fight her tightness. Every muscle in Steph’s hips and rear twitches to not impale herself, to not move. They’ll make a mess between them with her dripping down the backs of her thighs. Even over her panting and the showerhead spitting she catches the wet squelch of Billie’s fingers playing in her</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Tightening around those thick digits is Steph’s only form of rebellion. She risks it, and Billie tears a long groan out of her when the flat of her knuckles grazes her. Her thumb has perfect aim sliding between soft folds to play video games with her clit. Rolling around until she’s buzzing and then petting from her hood down over and over again. Like this, Billie traps her between the sensations of her fingers rocking just barely in and out but her thumb toying with her little clit. Billie may bottom out inside her, but she has plenty of tricks. Wicked fingers curl and thrust over where Steph needs them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh god!” She pleads through a breath, clinging impossibly tighter to Billie’s shoulders. The arm looped under Steph’s ass knocks her back up the wall, creating some space between them. Some leverage. “Harder, Billie, harder!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hold on to me,” Billie grunts, her voice rough from purring.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie shifts her body to pin Steph with her shoulders. This way, she bows her hips out to create more room. More space to draw her arm back and thunder into Steph, fingertips pressing along velvet heat to seek the roughness within her. Her thumb follows the momentum up to stroke up and over her clit. A rattling moan leaks out of Steph with every brush of her sweet spot. It doesn’t take long for Billie to build up a rhythm where Steph only quiets to swallow and take a breath. Otherwise, she is a continuous note rising and falling. In and out of her, a slick glide, thumb smearing. Her voice climbs higher, breathier, frantic to the point of hysteria. Steph’s nails hook into Billie’s back and gouge her when her orgasm spills out of her, overflowing at last.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Oh and the rush of it all, her snapping tightly around Billie’s thundering pace, thumb not letting up. Steph’s voice is not hers to control anymore as her cries mirror the strength and intensity of those waves. High and loud and twinkling at first. When Billie’s knuckles still smack into her dripping on the floor. And then her voice cuts to almost a whine while Billie slows down. Still breathless, but no longer crying out. The rolling waves around Billie slow further, and she responds with gentler caresses inside her. Steph is mostly quiet breaths with little whimpers, shaking so hard she couldn’t stand up even if her feet were on the ground. She’ll need to wash off one more time. The bottom curve of her ass and the backs of her thighs drip a little. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph’s shuddering coo when Billie slows to a stop is the sweetest nectar. Billie cranes her head up to have a taste from the source, and Steph gives it to her, mouth full of lapping tongue. Billie eats up the next coo she coaxes out of Steph while sunk deep inside and swirling her thumb in lazy patterns. It gets the omega squirming on her thick fingers. Steph’s heart climbs into her throat as new soreness blooms inside her. Right against Billie’s fingertips pressed firmly towards her navel. Billie adjusts her grip that sends those pads nudging her sweet spot again and again. Steph’s breaths turn thick and desperate lightning quick until she’s panting all over again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Billie wh-what are you-oh god, o-ohhh alpha!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>This time, Billie’s fingers inside her are the stars of the show. Her thumb barely shifts over Steph’s pulse thundering in her poor clit. Her pulse or the waves of her tightening madly around Billie. Again. She’s not sure, too busy sending her cry up to the ceiling. Barely remembering to breathe until her moans turn thin and reedy. This second orgasm barrels into her like a felled tree rolling down a hill, taking everything else out in its path: Steph’s voice, her hearing, the sensation of her body, her everything. All she knows are Billie’s fingers inside her curling over her sweet spot with every, deep clench of her body. The intensity of this second orgasm puts Steph out of her mind even after Billie nuzzles her and slowly draws her fingers free. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her legs are useless when Billie guides them back to the ground. She sort of hunches in front of Steph when the omega’s weight threatens to tip over and spill her to the floor. Big hands cradle her hips, steadying her, and urge her to lean against the wall. Billie cages her in like that as Steph catches her breath and learns how to stand again. It’s not an instantaneous process, and Billie contents herself with petting up and down Steph’s sides while nuzzling her hair. Purring again. It’s such a pretty thing, something of course Billie would do. Steph just hadn’t thought about it before, Billie being so happy she purrs. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Stand up and take your weight while I clean you up. Or wash yourself while I hold you,” she grumbles lightly in Steph’s ear. “I can’t do both at the same time.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph nods, and then Billie shuffles them back into the spray for a third time. Hands shaking, Steph slaps them to the pipes of the shower and sort of huddles against them while she lets Billie soap her lower half this time. She’s taken three showers in the span of like half an hour… How long have they been in here? At least Coach hasn’t come looking for them yet or come to lock up. Maybe she’s busy. Whatever the case may be, Steph is just thankful for their uninterrupted time. And the lack of an audience while she’d wailed and begged Billie for more. It’s over now, even with Billie’s soapy hands brushing up her inner thighs and petting black hair between them. There’s no passion in the caresses. Gentle yes, but no passion. It’s just Billie taking care of her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The silence that falls over them when Billie turns the water off again has an edge to it. Uncomfortable and tense. The elephant in the room. At the start of today, Billie had showed up at their lockers next to each other and talked and hummed and laughed. Arm casual where it looped above her head as she leaned into Steph’s space. Flirtatious just to watch Steph roll her eyes and snort. Typical between them since becoming friends. Sharing the easy mornings. That was only just today, seeming like weeks ago. And the things they did to each other! That was only moments ago, hasn’t yet become a memory, too fresh. Now… Steph huddles by the folded pile of her clothes on another bench and watches Billie’s skin gradually disappear under hers. Will the rest of her vanish like this never happened, too?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Um… Billie?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She pauses, broad back to Steph, halfway through twisting her bra around the right way.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yea?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A glance over her shoulder, and Steph almost wants to puff up at the way Billie glances at her up and down. There’s hope, then.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What uh… what are you doing after this?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie holds their stare a moment longer. Something passes over her face, closing it off, and she turns her head back around. She keeps dressing, too, and the closer she gets to finishing, the tighter Steph’s insides grow.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Probably go home. Maybe drive around looking for help-wanted signs for the summer.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She gathers up her things faster and faster, now. The things they’d shared here are so far away from Steph scrambling for something to say, something that will slow Billie down and make her talk about this. Now she won’t even look at Steph as she smacks her locker closed and snatches up her shoulder bag. Billie makes a wide path around Steph’s naked form and the bench holding her clothes. Still not looking at her and she makes for the doors to leave.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“See ya around.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The briskness of that hurts. No laugh, no wink, not even her name. Not even her last name, which would probably actually hurt more than Billie’s stiff goodbye. Steph doesn’t get anything out, whiplash from the mood drop too severe, as the locker room door bangs shut behind Billie. It’s the slam of a tomb door closing on this, on them. Even though Steph wants to slip her fingers in the gap, injury be damned. Billie’s departure takes that option from her. So Steph dresses on autopilot, numb and hollow, until everything is set to right. She glances over the locker room, wondering how it ever held them together in that moment, and then leaves with a defeated slump of her body.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie is still in the parking lot when Steph spills out. They’re two rows away from each other. But Billie sits in her car, engine idling, and watches Steph approach. Steph actually stumbles when her sneaker catches on the asphalt, staring through the air and the Camaro’s windshield at Billie’s stern expression. Even from the hood of her BMW she takes in Billie’s hand tight on the steering wheel, her jaw clenched even tighter. Does she even see Steph standing here? Steph’s keys in her hand are barely a blip on her radar as she can do nothing but watch Billie grit her teeth and sort of scowl. Why is she still here?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>If Steph is waiting for Billie to fling herself out of her car and march over here to say something, she’ll be waiting a long time. She knows that somehow, knows that whatever battle rages in that big brain of hers that Billie won’t come out. So Steph flashes her an uncertain smile, climbs into the driver's seat, and starts to make her way off school property. When she hits the stop sign to turn onto the main road, the Camaro is in her rearview mirror. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And it stays there. All through Main Street and out to Loch Nora through the gentle curves of the subdivision street. Steph makes herself dizzy with how wound up she is, glancing back and forth between the road and Billie’s distant face in the mirror. At first, she’d thought Billie would turn off and head across town to her own home or maybe park on Main Street to job hunt. Something. So Billie following behind her on the circle driveway in front of her house has the omega almost vibrating apart. What is this? What is Billie thinking? Steph sits in her car with the engine off for longer than she would, wondering what’s about to happen next.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They climb out together, twin clicks of their car doors shutting. Billie keeps her distance even after they share a pointed look. When Steph makes for her front door, Billie follows her even then. Hands shaking all over again, Steph tries to keep it cool and school her nerves so she doesn’t drop her fucking keys. When she proves herself victorious over the sticky lock and steps inside, she shuffles all the way in and holds the door open. If Billie is going to follow her inside, too. It could end here. Billie could just turn on her bootheel and just stalk right back to her car. So Steph tucks her head behind the ornate door and waits. She hears Billie step into the foyer rather than seeing her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie takes the front door from her and shoves it shut. Flicks her fingers over the deadbolt, too. They linger long enough here—Billie avoiding Steph’s gaze no matter how Steph searches for her—to remove their shoes. Steph’s natural pathfinding would lead her up the stairs to her room at this point. Billie being here shouldn’t make a difference. So she doesn’t let the alpha’s strange presence change that. Billie is right on her heels, hand gliding up the banister behind her on the exposed stairs. They don’t usually close Steph’s door when they’re together. Steph still faces her bed when Billie enters her room and does just that. Another click of a door sealing shut on them. Steph’s heart is already in her throat and about to explode when Billie’s hands take her shoulders and spin the world around her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She can’t help the thrill that pets over her skin when her back hits the bedroom door, Billie crowding against her. That pinched scowl from the parking lot twists once again onto her face. Knees bent and relaxed, Steph scrunches herself against the door and makes herself smaller. To placate Billie in some way, if Billie’s scowl is for her. Because of something she’d done. Steph is ready for anything at this point. Billie’s actions are typically confusing to anyone but herself until her grand design reveals itself. So Steph is ready for just about anything. Except Billie pressing every inch of them together, hands in Steph’s dry hair tilting her head up, and nuzzling her like back in the locker room.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph’s startle rattles the door in its frame but doesn’t budge Billie at all. The hands in her hair make doubly sure of that. They’re not harsh or cruel, no never; they hold her like she is made of glass and precious. Alphas are always quick to put their hands and arms around her to control her, to make a prize out of her. And depending on the alpha and the vibe at the time, she doesn’t mind. This is something else. No alpha has ever held her like she is to be protected and kept safe. They don’t care about nuzzling her and scenting her to mark her in such a passive way. She’d let Billie mark her in more possessive, more public ways. The thought strikes her like lightning, and her arms zip around Billie’s waist to hold her back.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A grunt puffs in her ear, so Steph squeezes her tighter. If Billie is going to hold her and love on her, then she’s getting held back! Steph even rebels against Billie’s hands in her hair to seek skin out and draw her mouth over the curve of Billie’s jaw. Not quite kissing, just dragging her lips over honey skin. Perfect, never a blemish, never a red spot. Eyes softly closed, Steph flicks free the reins on whatever this is and gives herself over to whatever is about to happen. Like Billie joking about a blowjob earlier, something builds between them again. The closer their nuzzling wanders to them facing each other, to kissing territory, the tighter the air grows between them. Until their eyes meet and someone pokes a hole in the dam and they fall into each other.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The back of Steph’s head and her shoulders surge against the door when Billie takes her lips. Steph’s hands scramble over her clothes to draw her closer. They’re touching all along their fronts anyway, but Steph wants the pressure of weight bearing down on her. To stop her wiggling and prevent her escape. Like before. She pops her hips into Billie’s, cheeky, and smiles into their kisses when a soft growl tickles across the divide. Billie pins her to the door like a butterfly in a display case, and Steph doesn’t mind when they rip apart with heavy breaths and shiny lips. All for Billie to pant and look at her, comb her hair out of her face to really see her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Voice willow-thin, Billie breathes, “What are we doing?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph huffs a few laughs out her nose and cranes her head forward for more. Billie hesitates only for a second, gnashing her teeth, before she sinks back to let Steph kiss her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Your guess is as good as mine, man,” Steph sighs with their lips grazing through each word. Billie guides her back to the door and then presses their foreheads together, sharing breathing space. “You’re the one who followed me home…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I wasn’t thinking.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Good.” Steph takes a lippy kiss from her, wet sound delicate at the end. She tilts her head in just the right way so they can see each other without going cross eyed. And Billie is stunning up close with her eyes so vulnerable, the mask cut free. “We think too much. It gets in the way. Cuz I’ve wanted you for a while now.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie’s weight finally surges against her with a growl on her lips. Something in Steph’s bedroom door creeks and snaps, whining under their combined weight and Billie’s power. Instead of worrying about it, Steph has to bite back a desperate sound from slipping out of her. Billie will feel it, though, as that tension in Steph works its way out of her body in a shiver. Now that Steph’s body knows this weight intimately, she craves it and the way it traps her. She could trill Billie away—stop, you’re hurting me, that’s too much—without a single word to escape, the alpha in her unable to resist protecting Steph even from herself. Steph doesn’t want to escape, hates it when the alphas of her past have backed down. This is exactly what she wants.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>When it ends as all things must, Billie doesn’t leave Steph wanting for long. She takes Steph by her jaw, walking them backwards while Billie stares at her through narrowed eyes. They share breathing space until Billie slows them to a stop, most likely at the foot of Steph’s bed. It’s not confirmed until Billie’s arms slither down, wrap around Steph’s waist, and she throws them on her bed together. Much like the door, Steph’s mattress and bedframe vigorously object to the abuse. Springs whine and wood cracks bright and sharp somewhere within the frame. Steph can’t care about that with Billie immediately scooping her up. Leaning half-propped against the headboard with Steph cuddled to her chest, Billie tucks the omega’s head to her neck. Offering to her first.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Billie,” she breathes into honey skin, surprise squeezing her voice tightly. “What—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ve been crazy about you since you fished me out of your fucking pool,” Billie almost snaps in her hair. Her hands in the center of Steph’s back and fisted in her hair shake. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The admission, no hesitation dragging it out, sends her heart fluttering. Steph cuddles all the closer and sends little trills against Billie’s pulse. That unwinds the alpha some. Enough for Billie’s fingers to relax in her hair and pet her even though Steph’s head rests on that arm. Billie can free herself if she wants to. Steph winds her legs around one of Billie’s and loops an arm over her side. They’re properly tangled up now, the perfect time for Billie to sigh and hide her face in Steph’s hair. Even though Steph can’t see her face anyway.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Back then… I was banking on someone not pulling me out. I didn’t care until I coughed pool water all over your face and cried in front of you.” Billie’s arms tighten to the point of pain. “And all you did was bring me inside and let me shower and crash in a spare bedroom.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The drop of Steph’s heart to ping pong around inside her leaves her choked and breathless. Billie truly hates herself so much that she would… </span>
</p><p>
  <span>A sigh deflates the tension that had wound Billie right back up. Her voice is almost toneless when she admits, “I stopped getting blackout drunk because of you. Because I never wanted you to look at me like that again.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph barely hears herself when she whispers, “Like what?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Quiet consideration. Just them breathing. Or barely breathing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And then, “Like it was the last time.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph remembers the evening well. Hadn’t felt anything like the gravity Billie speaks of now. Frantic and rambling to herself, she tried to talk her way through CPR like she knew the first thing about it. When she finally convinced herself to kneel beside Billie, tip her head up, and push air into her lungs, that’s when the alpha came to on her own. Steph doesn’t recall thinking or feeling anything in that split second where bloodshot eyes stared up at her like Billie was witnessing a miracle. Turns out she was. Swallowing hard, Steph tries to pull back so she can see Billie’s face. The hand in her hair doesn’t allow that, pushes back against Steph’s strength.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You-you don’t mean that,” Steph pleads. “You didn’t, hah, you didn’t really wanna die, did you? Billie?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie gives a hopeless sort of shrug. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ve been feeling that way for a long time. More after that little scrap we had back in November. Because I met you, and I hated everything and everyone here, but there was something different about you. And then I fucked it up beating your face in over Max… And then you hated me, so.” Another shrug. “Yea. I didn’t really care if I was alive after that. You were the only thing that made me hate being here less.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Yea, it sucks here, but there are a few things that make it tolerable.’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Startling in Billie’s arms, Steph blurts out, “Earlier when you said there were things that made it easier… You were talking about me?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A long, hard sigh drags out of Billie. Not annoyed. Just tired. This conversation must be difficult for her, and yet Steph cannot see a way to stop it. Even if they fall silent, they’ll be thinking about it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yep.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph bites her lip and presses her cheek to Billie’s throat. The alpha lets her, even cranes her head up to give Steph room. It just sends her heart tumbling all over again. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you still feel that way? That um that I make it better? That you’re… still crazy about me?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie swallows hard under Steph’s touch and rumbles, “I think about you all the goddamn time. Because if I stop thinking about you, I’ll remember wanting to die, and I don’t wanna think about that anymore. I don’t wanna die anymore.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Please don’t.” Steph shifts to press her nose to the ring of misery and sadness around Billie’s neck. “I don’t want you to die, either. I-I think about you all the time, too. Have since I met you.” Her hand on Billie’s back fists her t-shirt until she’s sure a seam pops somewhere. But it’s all she can do to clutch Billie to her and never let her go. “I promise I don’t hate you, man. Even after we fought, I didn’t hate you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie just breathes calm and slow under her. The room is too quiet when Billie says nothing back. Steph gives the big hand in her hair a real fight, wiggling and smacking into Billie’s palm. When that doesn’t work, when Billie just keeps hiding from her, Steph gives a hurt trill. That saps all the strength out of Billie, and her hand becomes a cradling thing again when Steph shifts her head to see Billie’s face. She’s turned away with hair spilling over her shoulder and expression. Hiding. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Billie.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nothing. Steph lifts her head that much more to press a kiss to Billie’s jaw. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Come on man, will you just look at me? Please?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A blue eye cracks open, but Billie doesn’t angle her head towards Steph. At least it’s progress. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph offers her a little smile and says, “I promise I don’t hate you. I really like hanging out with you. I like when you come over and we talk or just sit in the same room and do our own thing.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie finally jerks her head real quick to knock the shielding curtain of her hair back. Both eyes blink at her now. Steph doesn’t want Billie’s hand to stop petting her, but she needs to sit up. She wants to kiss Billie until that uncertainty stops hovering like a dark cloud over her handsome face. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I mean it. I like you… a lot.” Steph flashes another little smile, this time with pink heat in her cheeks. “I’m not lying, you know I’m not.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Now she wiggles to sit up instead of lying all over Billie’s front. The warm honesty wafting off Steph is inescapable. Even if Billie turns away again, she cannot avoid Steph’s eager scent. She still has to breathe. Steph swallows a laugh and a bubble of laughter. Not now, not while Billie is still so uncertain.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Can I kiss you? I really want to.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That perks the alpha up. Eyebrows twitching high for a second, Billie shifts slowly to sit properly against the headboard. A hop back from Steph gives her the room she needs to maneuver. They’re on equal ground again, and Steph rests her hands on Billie’s bent knees.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cheeks plumping up in a smile she can’t fight, Steph huffs a few laughs and asks again, “Please? I think about it a lot, and I finally got to today. I don’t…” Her hands tighten over the balls of Billie’s knees. “I don’t wanna go back to how we were, just friends or whatever. I don’t wanna go back to school on Monday and pretend like today didn’t happen. So please can I kiss you right now?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s up to Billie to decide. Steph gives her control on purpose so that Billie won’t feel backed into a corner. That would only make her squirm more, fight this more even if she wants it. Steph knows without even lifting her nose to catch Billie on the air between them that Billie wants her. In the locker room, she didn’t need to touch Steph back. That thing with picking her up and fingering her against the wall. Fresh color blooms under beauty marks when Steph thinks about it. She wants that to happen again. That and more. It’s a strange way to jump into a relationship, but to imagine life without Billie is…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie’s ring on her middle finger has some chill to it despite the warmth of her skin. She lifts that hand to pet the bumps of her knuckles up and down Steph’s cheek. Tracing the blush that’s all for her, Billie searches Steph’s face for something. The fresh scent of her holds no lies, only honesty. And no matter what Billie thinks of herself, if she hates herself or thinks Steph shouldn’t want her, she can’t fight Steph’s earnest desire blanketing them. Billie actually turns her head to cough and then draws in a breath that’s a little less choked with Steph. When she comes back around, that lingering uncertainty has melted into vulnerability. Afraid to take what’s on offer for fear of it being yanked away and dangled over her head.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Slim hands shift on Billie’s knees and take to petting up her thighs. Her jeans rasp under Steph’s palms. It’s crisp, better than the awkward silence while Steph waits for whatever comes next. All she can do is watch Billie war with herself like back at school, waiting for Steph to come to the parking lot. It’s only now that Steph wonders what Billie’s intentions had been, if she had any. Billie claimed to not be thinking while following her. Some part of Billie must have wanted to pursue Steph, to not let this go. To not let everything fall back into place on Monday, like Steph fears. Billie comes to a decision with Steph’s teeth about to rake over her bottom lip, anxious.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t… I don’t know what you want from me,” Billie says soft, helpless. Completely unlike the bravado she uses with everyone else. “I’m not good at relationships, and I’m not a good person to begin with, I-I don’t wanna hurt you…” Billie glances to the side with her palm cupping Steph’s cheek. Like she can’t stop herself even as she’s trying to talk Steph out of this. “You don’t even like girls.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph leans forward, snapping Billie’s eyes to her, and admits, “I like you. Isn’t that good enough?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her hands slide that much higher on the inseams of Billie’s jeans. Billie shakes the bed with a jolt, but she does not push Steph’s hands away. Doesn’t even cower under them. Billie’s right hand rises from the bed to cover one of Steph’s. Steph’s heart skips a beat at that. Billie wants her there, wants her touch. Steph holds her breath as Billie’s hand cupping her cheek slips down. Short fingers weave into her hair as Billie holds her just under her ear, thumb sort of petting the lobe. Her ears aren’t pierced like Billie’s, and she’s never been interested in earrings. Not until Billie. Billie does that to her, makes her change her opinion on things. Steph just wishes she could change Billie’s mind.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I want it to be good enough,” Billie admits with her voice low, lips barely moving. Expression muted but hurting just under the surface, Billie stares somewhere level with Steph’s nose or lips. Steph licks them when Billie adds, “It felt good today to just hold you and touch you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Me too. Even though I’ve never been with-with a girl or a female alpha, it felt…” Steph has to take a shuddering breath or she’ll squirm where she sits. “It felt really good, Billie. I want more.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“More?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph nods in her hand and shuffles closer. Thankfully, Billie is comfortable once more and leans casually on the headboard. She can escape on the other side of the bed if she wants to. Escape isn’t in her mind, and Steph knows because those wide blues are all on her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yea like…” She bites her lip through a smile, trying to keep it small so she doesn’t scare Billie with her enthusiasm. With her overwhelming desire for closeness and whatever tenderness Billie will give her. “I wanna go to the movies with you and go to the summer carnival with you. And I wanna hold hands with you and drive around and just be with you. Like girlfriends.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph knows she’s risking it all on one gamble. She doesn’t want to scare Billie away, but she also can’t lie. Billie values honesty above everything else—Steph had learned that the hard way, lying about Max’s whereabouts in November. Honesty is all Steph has in this fight against Billie’s doubts and uncertainty. Billie is good enough. She just doesn’t see it like Steph does.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You want that?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s not the response Steph expects, but she nods hard enough to bounce her hair.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yea man, I said I think about you all the time. If I were dating anyone right now, they’d be crazy with jealousy.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She means it in a funny way, and Billie gives her a huff and the tiniest tug of a smirk. It’s encouraging.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t know if anyone’s ever wanted to be my girlfriend before,” Billie muses. “Fuck buddy, sure, but not that.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You don’t-you don’t have to say yes now. Or ever. I just wanted you to know, especially after we had sex so…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie snorts.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Weird way to jump into a relationship, don’t you think?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I guess,” Steph laughs. “I feel like it suits us. We literally did everything backwards. We weren’t like enemies exactly but—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Certainly not friends,” Billie drawls.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yea, not friends, but then we got over ourselves and we’re friends now and…” Steph sighs and leans her head into Billie’s grip on her. Even this feels right. Everything about Billie feels good and right. “I just needed you to know the truth of how I feel about you. I just want you to be happy, I guess.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That’s all she ever wants for people she cares about. For them to be happy. She doesn’t know how to make Billie happy with all her twists and turns and dead ends. Billie isn’t anything like she’s ever dealt with before. She has a sneaking suspicion she’s the same for Billie, though. Someone who refuses to give up on her no matter how Billie thrashes and snarls. Always fighting with herself or someone else, even now. Steph drops her eyes to give Billie a moment and turns her attention to their hands on Billie’s thigh.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Carefully so that Billie won’t mistake her movement for rejection, Steph flips her hand under Billie’s. She recalls now Billie touching the inside of her wrist and hoping her scent would linger until Billie was alone. Now, Steph’s scent in her pillows and sheets has rubbed into Billie’s clothes, her hair. When the alpha goes home, she’ll do so in a cloud of Steph. Steph kindles the hope that the alpha will just flop right on her bed, fully clothed, and roll around to mix them together. If only Steph could be there to just leave her scent fresh. It’s a fantastical thing to keep her busy until Billie taps her on the wrist. Look up.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sorry, I was…” Steph’s free hand lifts up and sort of twirls vaguely around her head. “Thinkin’ about stuff. Lost up here, you know?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie cocks her head ever so slightly and murmurs, “Thinking about me?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie values honesty. Steph could easily just say that yes, she’d been thinking about Billie. Or she could be brutally honest.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I was thinking about you going home and rolling around in your bed. Because your clothes smell like me and you’d wanna mix us together, I guess.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie’s cheek blush splotchy across them and the bridge of her nose. Embarrassed but simultaneously not taking offense. Steph flushes hot under Billie’s thumb still caressing her cheek. It sounds silly now that she’s said it aloud, but she finds that she so badly wants Billie to do that. So the distance between them won’t seem so great. Traces of Billie lingering in her room are what lull her to sleep when she’s the loneliest: right after Billie leaves. Hellbent on making that real, Steph lifts her hand to Billie’s forearm. She cups warm skin and peach fuzz in her palm and pets Billie’s arm up and down, as far as her reach allows. Billie’s skin comes alive under her touch, and all that fuzz on her tightens into goosebumps. It insights a mutiny in Steph’s skin, too, and she shivers with a smile on her face.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I like it when you smell like me. And I hope other people can smell me on you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She’s never admitted that to anyone. Was afraid to admit it to herself until just now. Billie deserves the truth. Omegas aren’t thought of as possessive, but Steph disagrees. She doesn’t like smelling hands smeared across Billie’s shoulders or her upper arms. People getting cozy with her, because Steph knows Billie doesn’t like people hanging on her like that. She would rather hold someone in her arms than that. Or would rather throw her arm around them. So eventually when Billie does that, Steph always makes sure to draw her hand so casually over Billie’s other shoulder. Long enough to wipe her scent there, but not long enough to irritate Billie. Happens every day at school.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You really mean that.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s not a question. The wideness of Billie’s stare has nothing to do with shock. She just focuses unblinking and intense, her mouth not as stern as it could be. There lies the surprise. Billie tries to hide it, because her hope is wrapped up in it too, but Steph sees it clear as day. Steph stops the petting of her hand over Billie’s arm to grasp her wrist in loose fingers. Escape, if she wants it. Steph holds Billie’s wrist still as she turns her head in that rough palm. Cherry lips nuzzle the lines Steph finds there, and she even presses a few kisses to the center. That done, her scent rubbed into the very lines of Billie’s palm, Steph gives the alpha her attention once more.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I really mean it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie rolls her lips into a tense line, holds her breath, and then exhales as she relaxes. When some calm has settled over her, she gives one gentle nod.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I can’t promise anything,” Billie admits, thumb stroking Steph’s cheek one time. “I can’t promise I’ll be a good girlfriend or considerate or any of that shit. I’m not a very good friend in the first place so.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph says through a smile, “Yea, I already know all that. And I still want more anyway, man. Nobody knows better than me you’re a damn handful.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But you want me anyway.” Billie gives a soft shake of her head. “You’re not mild like I thought you were, baby girl. You’re wild.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She tacks on a sliver of a grin at the end, can’t help herself apparently. If she’s aiming to get a laugh out of Steph or at least a sputter out of her, it works. Steph snorts against Billie’s palm, turns to try and hide the smile fighting her. And winning. She comes back out only because some of Billie’s amusement at her own joke lingers in her face. No longer heavy with war or sorrow. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Dork,” Steph says almost under her breath even though she stares Billie full in the face while she says it. Louder, she adds, “I’m kinda curious, though, how you feel about this. We’ve been talking about me this whole time. What do you want, Billie?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You sure you want an answer to that?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I mean I’m asking, aren’t I?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lips pursed slightly again, Billie exhales hard through her nose and says, “Everything.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And Steph parrots back, “Everything?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Another hard exhale.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I hate coming to school and having to deal with the muddled scents of everyone. They don’t even stand out anymore, I’m always just looking for you. And when I find you in the morning, I don’t wanna leave when we have to split up. And then it’s just a grueling wait until lunch, see you again, more waiting, and then I get to see you one last time at our cars. And no matter the gossip or jokes I crack, you have to leave eventually. So I just think about that on repeat when I get home and try to avoid my family as much as possible.” Billie pauses to stare hard at her for a spell. “That’s my everyday. Hopping from moment to moment when I can see you and just be close to you again. And when we can’t see each other, well, then it’s just spreading out nothing to think about until I can’t stand it. Because I’m alone again, and I’d rather be with you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Distantly, Steph wonders if Billie feels the heat filling up her cheek when it’s over. Slowly and then all at once until Steph’s ears almost ring with it. They’re hot all the way into the cartilage too. Surely Billie notices where her fingertips sort of tickle that ear.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wow,” she breathes. “That’s… a lot. You feel that every day?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Every damn day,” she grumbles under her breath.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph tips her weight forward. Billie’s chest and arms catch her. They don’t quite knock into the headboard, but Billie grunts when their weight lands on her tailbone. Steph pays the alpha’s pained hiss no mind as she holds on tightly to her neck. Steph presses her face to that honeyed column and hums into the musk she finds there.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The first time she’d been in close contact with Billie, she mistook it for some sort of cologne. During their fight, Billie threw off her leather to let it pour out, almost steaming in the night. Steph knew then it was just Billie’s natural scent. It was her last thought before they were swinging and hissing like animals at each other. It was only Max grabbing Winnie Byers’ alpha mace out of her bag and spraying his sister directly in the face that put an end to it, sent Billie scrambling blinded and coughing to her car. The kids were the ones to drag Steph to the couch and try to clean up her bloody nose and split lip as best they could. She woke up with three different kinds of band-aids on her face.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Billie steadies them, though, all the power shifting in her legs to lean their combined weight into the headboard. Both arms had snapped around Steph’s waist at the moment of impact. Now, one hand wiggles away to cradle the back of Steph’s head. Her hair is probably a mess from Billie petting her so much. Steph won’t turn it down, though, and bumps her head into Billie’s hand to encourage her. The pressure on her scalp guides her head right back down. No complaints are made when Steph goes right on nuzzling and scenting the warmth she finds there.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Steph,” Billie sighs above her. “That feels…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph hums again in Billie’s neck and tips her lips up to laugh, “Amazing? Right?” She ducks back down for another hum, but comes back up quickly enough. “You can do it to me, too. It’s okay.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She even sits up to offer her neck, driving it home that it’s okay and she wants Billie to do it. Billie’s hand in her hair hesitates like it will fall away. Billie makes her decision in the next second, holds Steph’s head in support while returning the gesture to her throat. Billie is calm and deliberate whereas alphas of her past had dove right in and snuffled all over her to rub their scent everywhere they could reach. It’s never flattering and always makes her roll her eyes and end the scenting almost as soon as it began. Billie takes care to take her in before mixing them together. Meanwhile, Steph relaxes in those strong arms and forces down embarrassing noises that want to squeak out of her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Steph,” Billie murmurs in the hollow under her ear. “Jesus, what are you doing to me?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Almost laughing at the irony, Steph fires back, “That’s my line!” Billie calms some then, and that allows Steph to clear her head. “I’m trying to convince you to loosen up and be my girlfriend. You drive me crazy too, you know. The way you smell and how I can’t get you out of my mind. So? Will you go out with me?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph manages to bottle her physical startle when boyish lips brush a suckling kiss to her neck. She manages to channel all that tension inside her to her voice where she gasps and then groans so soft and broken. Billie doesn’t linger long enough to leave a mark. Steph revels in the tingling aftershocks, though, and wishes they could do that. When Billie pulls back and sort of urges Steph up with gentle nudges of her fingers, Steph knows it’s over. A shiver races through her as she sits up, craning her head into Billie’s touch.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I wanna try. Girlfriends, partners, lovers… Whatever you wanna call it, I wanna try, Steph.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“‘Lovers’ sounds silly but kinda romantic at the same time, but… girlfriends has a nice ring to it. My girlfriend, Billie Hargrove.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“My girlfriend, Stephanie Harrington,” Billie drawls right back, grin already spreading on her face before she finishes ‘Stephanie.’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uhg,” Steph groans, “Only my parents say my full name, don’t be a jerk. Say it right.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Steph’s slim hands bat at Billie’s shoulders a little. Making contact, yes, but not forceful enough to hurt. It gets Billie smiling, almost fully relaxed now. And to think Billie had once pressed her flush to the bedroom door. Now she’s maybe a breath or two away from dragging Billie into a kiss. She’s wanted to kiss Billie all this time, since stepping into her house. And Billie watches her lips when she repeats herself, amended.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“My girlfriend,” she purrs with a grin, “Steph Harrington.”</span>
</p>
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